Friday, July 18, 2014

The Horror Never Ends

That is it!! I want off this ride! Or at least a magic potion that makes my babies stay babies! This is absolutely ridiculous and terrifying!! (Excuse all the exclamation marks but I'm slightly freaked out...obviously.) In three days I won't have one but two...preteens! I know, right?! I'll let the horror subside a moment.

So Monday Madison turns ten. And let me tell you her age is just catching up with her attitude. There are some days I look at the the sassy britches giving me attitude and wonder where my sickly, quiet baby went. Don't get me wrong I'm ecstatic on one hand that she has finally found her voice. The girl barely spoke, even to us, till she was five or so. On the's hard not to shove a pop tart in her mouth just so she stops speaking for five seconds.

Boys way older than her give her attention that is totally unwarranted. (There was a clothlining incident when Martin's little buddy made a remark when she bent over. His buddy being thirteen and Martin being eleven didn't stop him from taking great exception to the fact that the posterior in question was his nine year old sister's. In truth the little delinquent is lucky it wasn't heard by her father and I, I'd marched his little hiney home and presented him to his parents then he'd be really sorry.)

Thankfully Madison finds physical contact repulsive. Whenever kissing comes on TV or the teenagers around her decide they need to broadcast their budding hormones the response is always the same. "Ewwwwwwww! They're eating each other's faces and getting germs! That is so disgusting!" What mother doesn't want to hear that from her child? It's like music to my ears.

The only downfall is the girl definitely appreciates beauty. She's been known to remark he sure is pretty, to bad he opens his mouth and that goes out the window. The first time she referred that way to a different boy that was showing off for her I about fell off the porch swing.

 On one hand I'm quite positive the girl will be as selective as I was on who can take her on a date. On the other I'm fairly certain she'll find the one and like us there will be nothing anyone can do to tell her differently. I can only hope she holds to this wisdom that she has now cause when full blown hormones come into play she might just become the typical teenager trying to give her parents a heart attack.

Maybe we can just wrap the house in electrified barbwire. Wish me luck folks.