So you're now a mother of a precocious toddler and you start thinking like any other mom. Checking the internet for milestones, clicking the latest blog post shared by other mom's, making major decisions for your little one and yours life. But then other mom's start telling you how idiotic your choice is. Or you see people mocking your life choices. (Come on we've all either been on one end or the other of a vegetarian or vegan joke. In my case I get called a carnivore repeatedly by my veggie friends and I tell them every time, no, I eat my vegetables I'm an omnivore.)
My question is why do a mother's personal choices affect other mothers in such a way they lose their ever loving minds?! Literally, a sane normal mother can take her five minute respite while her child sleeps, get on facebook, see one post anti/pro whatever, and that's all it takes for Daddy to come home to a raving lunatic. (At least that's what Honeybear says.)
Every mom has done this too. "Well, I'll just explain from the other side and then they'll see we're really on the same path." .....Thirty minutes later and a hundred plus comments you're either doing one of three things; raving like a lunatic to your toddler as they bring you toy after toy, scouring the web to share links that prove you're right, or sitting there stewing thinking I'm not going to say anything and be the bigger person...oh fine one more comment.
Let's look at it from Karen's point of view. She started out with the typical first born, quick to reach milestones, puts on weight like a sumo, and running by ten months of age. (This is extremely bad considering Karen is five months pregnant and exhausted.) But then here comes that second bouncing bundle of joy. Clearly larger the the first at birth, clearly not reaching any milestones, losing weight and withering before Karen's eyes. She finally gets a pediatrician to listen, and down the rabbit hole they go.
Fast forward five years. Karen has tried every diet, med, and lifestyle doctors have thrown her way. BB2 has had every test and screening possible. His sibling is the picture of "NORMAL" and gets vaccinated at the correct intervals, while eating everything in sight.
What does Karen get bombarded with? Your an "anti vaxxer" *appropriate gasp of horror* Karen patiently explains no just one child seems to be allergic to something in them. Next parent; You fully vaccinated your child. *appropriate gasp of horror* Yes, him being fully immunized is important for the others health. *crazy eyes from other parent* One more parent: You feed one vegetarian *appropriate gasp of horror* No it's a new dr prescribed diet. Aren't you worried about the protein to help with growth. Well, it is doctor prescribed so....NO. Superior parent at child's play group: You raise your own meat, omgosh you're scarring your children. *runs away screaming* Karen just shakes her head and grabs the goat milk that is the only thing BB2 can have without violently being ill looks from BB1 to BB2 and smiles, knowing only a mom doing her best to fill the individual needs of her children can be on all sides of the mama wars at the same time.