antifeminist

The other day I was told by a guy “You’re the kind of woman that keeps woman down.” No, I didn’t type that wrong, really it was a guy. I’ll just wait right here while you absorb that, and let the laughter die down. Are ya done now? Okay, one more minute.

Anyways as I tried (unsuccessfully) to contain my laughter, I flashed back to Jerry Clower and the woman libber. Jerry Clower? You know Jerry Clower. Marcel Ledbetter? Oh geeze, he was around before Andy Griffith. America’s first “oral storyteller”, other words a stand up comedian.

Let me summarize the story for you. He’s waiting backstage when a women’s libber comes in an tells him she’s going to free his wife from oppression. He looks at her and goes “Ma’am, mama has a house keeper, a brand new car every year, and doesn’t get up till she wants to. (I am summarizing he is much funnier.) Mama, don’t want you messing with the deal she’s got.” I feel the same way.

Look at it from my point of view. I haven’t held a job in almost ten years. (Don’t get it wrong, I worked hard when I was gainfully employed. Ask my Mama, I earned over two thousand dollars in a little over a month ,while keeping straight A’s in my advanced classes.) I get to spend every day doing what I love. I am a teacher, I am a nurse, and I am a personal chef. But all those jobs are for the ones I love the most-the dogs. Just kidding, my family.

Anytime I want something (okay, I am a mom that doesn’t happen a lot) I get it. And sometimes it appears before I ever ask. Honeybear is a smart man, you keep mama happy you got it made.

Actually that brings up a valid point let’s look at this from my family members point of view. Honeybear never has to pick out or rummage for clothes. He never has to come home to anything less than a delicious meal, this is probably a little bit of a con. (He has put on about twenty pounds or so since our marriage almost a decade ago.) He is the envy of all his friends and acquaintances, they love when I bake for the break room. And for all intensive purposes he has it made.

Now look at it from the kids’ point of view. They have the storybook life. They help mama cook, they get to study things in a way that interests them. (I don’t care what anyone says, you put physics in front of a kid with a Scooby twist they’re goin learn.) They are also the envy of their friends (well not so much anymore since most of their friends are home schooled or have stay at home mamas too.) They are growing up the way people grew up fifty years ago. And they love it.

(I did try and get a part time job about two years ago this month. We wanted to have a really big Christmas {that’s the year we decided going broke wasn’t what Christmas was about-after the fact.} This resulted in a couple of things. Degan quit speaking to me for two weeks, Madison wouldn’t sleep till I came home to read to her, and Martin told me he hated me being gone and wished I was like other moms and just stayed home. That job did not last longer than four weeks.)

So if I am a woman that keeps woman down all I gotta say is Jerry Clower hit the nail on the head, “Mama don’t want you messin with the deal she’s got.” And I will add,"This family don't want you messin with the deal they got."