Saturday, October 30, 2010

it really shouldn't be that hard

This is what Degan said as he showed Bella once again the bunny running around the tree. I look at him thinking, you realize she isn't even three? You got a better chance of teaching D to use the toilet. But Degan, then Madison sat and patiently tried to show Bella over and over again.

Bella calmly looked at them both, picked up both laces, tied them in the underloop. Stood up, bowed, said "Tank you", and walked away. Degan smacked his face and hollers her name, before falling backwards. Madison dives giggling, ordering her to sit down, and Bella neatly side steps her. She smiles and says, "Can't catch me."

Can anyone else see what is about to happen? Martin makes a grab for her, and the chase is on. This chase lasts exactly five seconds. Ending in a dog pile, when Bella trips on her shoe lace. With Martin, Madison, and Degan doing one of those cartoon stops. You know the ones. Where the first person stops short, the second runs hard into their back, and the third causes all of them to fall.

This wouldn't have been so bad, except Bella decided to bite whoever she could get to. This was thought to be an act of war for the boys. Assuming that one of them would be the culprit not their dear, sweet, baby sister. The tangle that ensued was punctuated by howls of pain, anger, and several struggles.

I start grabbing waists, and throwing them to the side. When everyone is separated and I go to help Bella up...she bared her teeth and growled at me. Seriously she bared her teeth and growled. Then she announces,"I a monster. GRRRRRR." Martin has this look of absolute astonishment on his face, looks at Degan and Madison. Then hollers, "Get her."

Once again the battle is on. But this time I'm in the middle. The only way to call parlay was to shout above the ruckus. (By now D is barking, Gypsy is giving everyone disdainful looks, and chaos once again reins.) I shout," Who wants pudding?" That stops everything so suddenly you could hear a pin drop.

God bless whoever figured out how to make instant pudding. Without it I wouldn't have a bargaining chip.

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