Thursday, October 17, 2013

kids real superpower

     Everyone knows children possess selective hearing. One second they can't hear you repeatedly saying pick up your socks, the next they can hear ice cream being scooped a mile away. (Martin's words from a few years ago that have always stuck with me.) But until recently I would have believed that was their dominating selective power. My children of course love to open my eyes to their truth.

     It started quietly and snuck up on me. Surprising right? Most the time it's more of a knock to the back of the head. See public school gave me two things 1) my children test out in the genius level 2) the public school thought after a year that their tests were wrong.  In three years I have proven 1) the schools test are pretty accurate 2) the teachers are not geniuses...but my children can really make you want to pull your hair out at times.

     I have spent the last three years throwing myself wholeheartedly into the world of homeschooling. Okay so the first couple of months we might have slept in...and stayed in our pjs way too late...and watched a whole lot of pbs. Hey they were in Kindergarten and Preschool neither technically were even the 7 year old state required school age. 

    Point being we've been at this a while. Most days are typical. Kids do reading and group spelling while I make breakfast. We do math and science. Break for lunch and start in with geography or history. Usually finishing with asl. Lots of days we end up sidetracked into science yet again.  The kids have "homework"
we prefer the term independent work. It earns them electronics time if completed in a timely manner. (Don't tell my brother but I also read the dictionary to the kids. I believe in a superb vocabulary.)

     Lately though the independent work has become a major competition between the kids. They sneak their workbooks under the table trying to complete a page or two during class or reading while I cook. I got so frustrated I banned them for a week trying to get our class time focused. HA!

Me: Martin what place value do you start multiplication from?

Martin: ....uh? The spongy part.

Me: No we're actually into math here. Madison what place value do you start all math problems from?

Madison: *whispering* no you spell it P-U-

Me: MADISON! DEGAN! Put that up! What place value do you start with in this problem?

Degan: I thought we were doing science?

Me: We are trying to review place value if y'all want to participate.

*Degan raises his hand*

Me: Yes, Degan?

Degan: Can I play on the tablet after school first?

Me: You all fail and I am sending you back to kindergarten.

Martin: *rolls eyes* Like that would even work mom. We'd out read Bella.

     Now we've went through place values every year and whenever one reaches a math milestone that requires refreshers. So do I doubt my children KNOW what place value to start at? No. But then you get the flip side of selective intelligence.

     Let me set the scene. My children sit around the dining room table workbooks out. Madison is doing a worksheet on similes. Martin on possessive nouns. Degan is just speeding through his workbook.

Madison: No. You're wrong. They are different!

Martin: Are you kidding me?! They're just metaphors of similarities.

Madison: No they're an exaggerated comparison.

     Yeah. That's really what I walked into. They were arguing over the definition of a simile. I called my mom and she said, "I wasn't aware they knew those words." Lol. Yeah and more. But their father says its annoying to have a conversation with someone throwing out ten dollar words and they get tired of explaining themselves to their friends, so they tend to use them just to annoy each other and win an argument.  But my question is why can't they even follow a subject change in class yet manage to confuse adults with things they throw out. It's simple their real superpower is SELECTIVE INTELLIGENCE! 

One mystery solved. Onto the next. Till next time y'all.

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